3 Ways to Simplify Life and Avoid Overwhelm
It’s incredibly easy to get overwhelmed, and we do it to ourselves all the time. We get stressed and frustrated… yet we keep doing it.
We sign up to bring something to that potluck, we have this volunteer shift to go to, we have our jobs, that report, this paper due, don’t forget to make dinner, oh! and it’s holiday time, so we buy the presents, wrap the presents, go to all the parties, see all the pretty lights, make a snow angel, be sure to share on social media how great everything is, was that doctor appointment today? Maybe I can still squeeze in a few episodes on Netflix, I need a break from all of this.
It is a strange phenomenon that despite how crazy busy we always are with things that need to get done, most of what we end up doing isn’t productive or important at all.
We always have time for the things that are most important to us. Watching where our time goes, does it match what you say is most important?
Yet at the same time, it’s a default to take a break from the overwhelming sense of perfectionism and staying busy. Both glorified traits in today’s world that we could use a lot less of.
So when you get overwhelmed (again… and again), pick one — just one — to help you reduce the stress. Don’t try to do all the things. That defeats the purpose. But pick one and run with it.
Find One Thing
I saw the most amazing sunrise this morning. When was the last time you stopped to watch one of those? Or if morning isn’t your thing, the last time you watched a sunset? They are pretty breathtaking. I confess it has been a while for me. I get up and dark o’clock and jump right into work, going all day until dinner, at which point the sun has already set, because winter.
But watching this sunrise this morning was exactly what I needed in the crazy overwhelming scope of things that I am dealing with right now. It made me stop. It didn’t have to physically grab me and sit me down to do it, but somedays it probably should.
Random side note about this, this sunrise didn’t physically grab me. It would have been beautiful whether I was watching or not. It doesn’t show off the stunning colors for praise, attention, money or anything we usually spend our days chasing. This completely free color show happens every day. It was the simple beauty and gentleness that lets so many pass by that completely stopped me today. It’s something I should do and be more often.
But maybe that’s not such a random side note. Maybe that is a little more of what we should be doing and how we should be doing it.
Creating beauty around us in some way shape or form. It will be different for everyone. And doing it because it is good and important.
I can hear you saying it now, “But you can’t make a living off of sharing things, it’s just a bunch of fluff.”
First off, this isn’t about making a living. It’s about dealing with being overwhelmed and finding something that matters and makes it all worth it. It can be something you do before or after work, just make sure the time is there for it every day. Rain or shine, up or down days. There needs to be something meaningful and important. Some kind of respite that is more than just parties, social media browsing, and Netflix.
Secondly, this isn’t a fluff piece. This is something being shared from an incredibly rough time in my life. A time that makes you rethink what is really important. And once you know what is important, it then becomes a matter of making it more prominent in your life and sharing it with others. Because I can guarantee you aren’t alone in that. If it is important to you, it is important to others.
Find something that is meaningful and important to you. Maybe it’s a sunrise or a sunset. Maybe it’s taking a walk or 20 minutes for a short read. You might need to write something, maybe it’s a music escape. But find something just for you that gives you a chance to pause and pull out of the busy schedule.
Pick One Thing
Forget doing multiple things all at the same time. Sometimes, one task, in particular, is overwhelming enough. I’ve always been someone who gets overwhelmed easily, even as a child. Luckily, I had a wise mother who helped teach me some coping skills. I had forgotten until a recent conversation in which she reminded me of her secret.
She couldn’t just tell me to clean my room as a child. That was too much for me. I would sit in my room stressing about how dirty it was and that it wasn’t getting clean.
So Mom came up with a battle plan that worked really well for me as a child. And it continues to work as an adult, though with a few variations.
Rather than telling me to clean my room, she would tell me to pick up my clothes. Once my clothes were taken care of, she would tell me to make my bed. After the bed was made, she told me to pick up my toys. And so forth until the room was spotless.
So rather than dealing with everything at once, break it down. Only focus on one thing at a time. The rest will certainly hit, but just push them back and say, “No, it’s this thing’s turn, I’ll deal with you later.”
Dealing with one thing at a time helps push back the overwhelm of dealing with all the things at the same time.
We are not meant to take on everything at the same time. It is physically impossible for a human being with one brain, two arms and two legs to do so many things at once.
We can be in one place at a time. We can focus on one thing at a time. On occasion, if we are also doing something that doesn’t require significant brain power, we can do two things at a time.
That is not a challenge.
Don’t do something halfway just to prove me wrong. Yes, I get that we could do more than one thing, but the quality level drops and it takes longer and you come out with a massive headache. Just don’t bother. Do it right the first time.
Pick one thing at a time and work on it.
And sometimes, it’s ok if the one thing you are doing is picking one thing. It’s called planning and is also important.
Remember One Thing
We are not meant to be multi-taskers. While yes, humans can grow and evolve and change, we can’t do it quite that quickly. A short 100 years ago and for thousands of years before that, our main focus was survival. We had one goal in mind and the entirety of days was spent towards that purpose.
We now live in a time of relative luxury. If you are reading this article, chances are you aren’t focused on surviving another day, you are already pretty confident of that fact. Many don’t have that luxury and still wonder where their next meal will come from, where they will sleep that night and so on.
Meaning all of these important things that have to be done right now are of significantly less importance than we really think they are.
Meaning if it doesn’t get done it’s ok.
The world will not end. You will not die (though there may be a few exceptions to this, like taking medicine, treatments, etc.) and you will not have to toss everything in the air and say, “Forget it, life is hopeless and I’m a failure.”
Good news, you are human. My very wise grandmother often tells me, “If it’s not a matter of life and death or a matter of eternal consequence, it’s a minor inconvenience.”
When I start getting stressed about even one thing that is suddenly so incredibly important, I pull out this adage.
This college paper I have to write that in and of itself is 3 credits... Yeah, I won’t die. Not a matter of life or death. At least it won’t kill me if I remember that it’s ok to get some sleep and break for food once in a while. Those are kind of important. Those are more likely to affect life or death more than the paper will.
Will I be eternally judged and thrust down to hell if I don’t get an “A” on that paper? Probably not. I guess that would depend on your own religious views though.
Not getting something done is not the end of the world. Neither is falling short of perfection. Especially when we live in a time where we are relatively safe.
Keeping the idea of the bigger picture in mind, we can take a lot of the stress of overwhelm off.
Decisions, Decisions
With so many things to do and so many options to deal with it, solutions to overwhelm can be just as exhausting as the overwhelm itself. How do we know what to choose? Everyone will need something different. No matter what you choose, choose one. Stick with it.
One.
No more at a time. While all three of these techniques will be helpful in different instances, feel free to add in another as things become more manageable.
Now What?
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